On this day, May 26th, I have made a big decision. Let me share…
Last night I watched myself act in my friends short film, ‘Mute’, as part of the 48hour film project. When asked to do the role, my friend explained the character was a depressed woman, locked in her flat, no make-up, dark circles. “Great”, I said, “I won’t even need to go into make-up!”. I wasn’t kidding.
Now, most of you might think it was insane, to go on a big screen with no make up on. But I knew I had to do it. I knew I had to show myself, to myself, if that makes sense. I knew I couldn’t hide, I knew I couldn’t ‘put a filter’ on it, or put my head down, as I am fond of doing lately.
And it was that moment, right there, that I realised a lifestyle change was due. Okay, not right there, but definitely when the film was shown. There I was, on screen, on the big screen I might add, looking hideous.
Now, I don’t mind, how I look most of the time. I grew up in the wonderful time we call the 80’s and 90’s, when looks were nowhere near as important as they are today. So, i’m all good with my chubby face, I’m even good with my ageing. But, I’m not as okay with my rosacea. Which, incidentally, was full on, angry red, on screen. And, that was the turning point. Seeing myself, on the big screen, full on ARRF (angry red resting face), made me think I HAVE to start making some better lifestyle choices.
Now, I have tried everything for Rosacea, but nothing has worked. I think this is because I have a Thyroid Disease. I’ve had this for 15 years, and my doctor thought for 10 years before it was diagnosed, so most of my life. I’ve been taking medication for 15 years, which has never affected me, but now it’s starting to show. Lack of energy, poor skin, nails and hair, and of late, my mind, urgh! When I take a lower medication dose, my skin clears like magic. Is this a coincidence? Unlikely. Now, I can’t not take the medication, so I have tried everything else instead.
I have have my skin microdermobrased, lasered, and PRP’d, but one thing I have never fully followed is a real healthy lifestyle. Monitoring what I put into my body, and how I function in my day to day. Staying away from stress, away from pollutants and standing firm with vitamins and exercise.
It is time to take a good look at myself, and start to put project health in place. I have just finished a degree, have a wonderful partner, two grown up children, and a great new job. I have lots of ducks in a row, now, it’s time to put myself back in the room.
The best place to start any project, is to research, research, research. First, what do I have that I can use? The second thing is how will I do this? I’ve already outlined that below in bold.
- I have a juicer, a blender and a freezer full of frozen smoothie mixes – I have to start using them.
- I have a gym 5 minutes from my house – I need to re-join and work out a programme.
- I have the internet and an Amazon account – I need to do my food research, buy the right books, follow the correct recipes and start making healthy meals and snacks.
And this is where you find me now, I have pledged, I am ready. Watch this space as they say!